Unfortunately this is a hard one to answer as it depends on the ethnicity of the person, as the response of the parents will vary and may cause much heartache to both parties.I have spoken to many LGBTQ persons since Davina came out and most have not felt comfortable enough to come out to their parents – especially Asians and people of African descent.
However, it seems that white Europeans are able to tell their parents who have embraced the idea. The idea of being Gay is still taboo amongst African Christians and Muslims especially. If only the parents of those could realise how much pain their children are going through. I have seen, my own daughter, Davina, go through being a withdrawn teenager to a confident Woman. It affects the whole family and some parents may hear it from the child but shrug it off.
I remember telling my Mother about Davina but she shrugged it off and it was never discussed again. I felt isolated as I could not tell my brothers and sisters. It was Davina who informed them all by text and they all sent loving messages back, which surprised me. So it is never as bad as you may think. If the family loves you then it should not change anything as you are still the same person.
I find it is still hard for an Asian or African parent to comprehend their child being LGBTQ and they will either brush it off or react like I did.The advice I would give would be that if the person has a close bond with their parents, then it would not make a difference as the parents would love them unconditionally.
I have gay friends whose parents suspect but the topic is never discussed and therefore the gay person has to live two lives and can end up depressed, bitter and frustrated. It is surprising how many cannot talk to their parents about it even in this day and age.
I would urge the person to talk to their parents about how they feel. I would urge the person to talk on how it is affecting them to not live their life truthfully and to educate them by explaining their feelings.
Davina actually wrote me a long letter telling me how much she loves me. She said that as her best friend and because of the close bond we have, she did not want to lie to me. I remember telling both my daughters as they approached their teens that no matter how bad a problem they had, they should always feel comfortable to speak to me about it. I also told them that I would rather be the first to hear about anything and not through rumours in our community. I think this may have helped Davina. We are very open and can discuss anything as Mother and Daughter. It may also help the parent to speak to other Asian parents or gay people like I did, young and old.